three

You asked me once to write you a letter on confidence and relationships.

I think of confidence as a choice. It’s not that I don’t see my flaws or don’t think negative thoughts about myself, it’s that I don’t let them be the focus of my attention. I choose to focus on the things that will make me happy, that will make me feel good.

If I don’t think I’m pretty enough to be talking to a guy of interest, well then I definitely won’t come off very attractive. Our thoughts have power that way. But if I decide to focus on the fact that I’m funny and smart and my boobs look nice today than why shouldn’t he like me?

And maybe he doesn’t. But I’m not losing anything by trying. Only gaining something if I’m successful.

I used to be so stressed by the result of my flirtations and crushes.

But now I’ve realized: to the right person, you can do no wrong, you can say no wrong.

Sure, you might say something silly or embarrass yourself a little, but if someone likes you, they like you. They don’t attach modifiers to everything you do.

I think we were taught to wait for men to come to us. To wait for men to make every move. But I’ve unfortunately yet to meet a man who can read minds… and sometimes they just have no idea what we’re thinking.

Speak your mind. Take action. Go after what you want.

You’re starting from equilibrium. You can stay where you are and have everything you have. Or, you can take a chance and maybe move forward.

It’s a choice you get to make. If you want to feel sexy, decide you’re sexy. Decide to focus on all your many strengths. They outweigh your weaknesses, but we get so inside our own heads that we don’t see that.

We only see the why not’s.

You are so beautiful inside and out. The greatest love story is finding that within yourself.

It’s the only guarantee of who we spend our lives with.