sit still, look pretty

As an actress, I’ve always struggled to maintain a healthy relationship with my body. While things have improved, there is a huge pressure, especially on women, to look a certain way.

I used to internalize that I would never work as an actress if I wasn’t a super fit, tiny, sexy, woman.

And while it will always be true that what you look like matters as an actress, it is not the only thing that matters. And being sexy is not the only thing you can be.

I’m tired of asking my self to be small to please men. If it’s to make my self small when I’m walking to work, so men won’t catcall me, or if it’s putting myself aside to be more accommodating, or if it’s physically being as small as possible so that I look the most attractive to the male gaze.

I’ve worked really hard to see my worth outside of my exterior. And to change my relationship with my body – it is my instrument, so I have to treat it well. It’s not about looking a certain way, but rather, feeling a certain way. And choosing the healthy habits that make me feel the best.

Women are so much more than sex objects, and finally – some – television is willing to showcase that. I loved hearing Krysten Ritter talk about how she wasn’t expected to be beautiful on Jessica Jones. Jessica is a mess, and it was okay for Krysten to look like one too.

Alison Brie talked about how on Glow, the producers took the women aside and told them that they hired them because they were women of all shapes and sizes. They wanted the women to be strong and capable of performing their own stunts, but otherwise, to keep their bodies exactly the way they are.

I’m excited to see more women write and direct tv shows, so we can continue to see more dynamic women on screen. Similar to Alison Brie’s character, I want women to have as exciting and complex characters as the men.

So we can see real, fully-fleshed out women dealing with their own high stakes problems, looking pretty or looking not.